Pentagonese

How to Speak Pentagonese

While you’re employed by the Department of Defense, you will replace words in the left-hand column with words in the right-hand column:

Don’t Say This…		Say This!
Permanent military bases		Enduring military bases
Occupation forces		Liberating coalition forces
Iraqi Freedom fighters		Criminal insurgents
Illegal secret kidnapping		Extraordinary rendition
Torture		Interrogation technique
The US Constitution.		“Just a goddamn piece of paper.” *
Anti-war advocates		Terrorist supporters
Stall the press with more bullshit.		The Pentagon is launching a full investigation.
The President pleads the fifth.		The President refuses to comment on national security matters.
Cheny lied out the front of his face…		Cheney misled…
Get a second opinion		Listen to the extremist ideology of Islamofacist evildoers
Invade another nation.		Defend freedom around the globe.
Civil war		Making progress

*That’s a quote from the President, not the Pentagon. See this Capital Hill Blue article: President Curses US Constitution.

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via: hard-boiled dreams...