When The Ego Dies

“From the smallest particle to the largest galactic formation, a web of electrical circuitry connects and unifies all of nature, organizing galaxies, energizing stars, giving birth to planets and, on our own world, controlling weather and animating biological orgnanisms. There are no isolated islands in an electric universe".
David Talbott and Wallace Thornhill
Thunderbolts of the GodsWhen The Ego Dies...
By Michael Goodspeed
Thunderbolts.info
8-24-6

I wonder what it means when one mourns a loss before it has happened. Is it prophetic grieving, or self-fulfilling prophecy? I think the question is terribly important, now more than ever. A lot of us are living with a terrible sense of foreboding doom. Is our collective psychic gut tensing itself for some terrible tribulation, or are we actively dooming ourselves with our glum thinking?

I don't mean to be a wise-ass, but the answer is clearly "both." We feel the momentum of the past -- all of our habitual thoughts and behaviors as a species -- nudging us toward self-annihilation, and yet we feel powerless to change. Of course, we find this terrifying. I suspect it is the same inner dread that addicts feel when they sense the need for a fix coming on. Yes, they COULD resist the impulse for that first snort, shot, drink, or hit, but they know they lack the necessary will and clarity of purpose to do so.

So it is with the entire human race. We know this game is going to end tragically, even though the tragedy will be avoidable right up until the last moment. A miracle is necessary to save us, and miracles DO happen, but only when you believe in them. And when all you believe in is darkness, miracles are downright scary.

Darkness can be comforting. It affords one a place to hide, even if the light he is hiding from is actually his salvation. Most often, human beings hide in their concepts of themselves. You wake up in the morning and only feel safe if you know who you are. You think, "I am safe because my name is blah blah. I am special because my girlfriend loves me, I have a good job, my body looks great, and I'm better than most people. Of course, if I lost all of this, I would have know IDEA who I am, and life would lose all meaning."

This is the story of human life, and we all know how it ends...