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Lust Telepathy: An Unexplored Psychological Phenomenon (Poll)

Dr. Belisa Vranich

During the first rip-your-clothes-off phase of love, psychologist and author Dr. Helen Fisher describes lust as equal to drug addiction--specifically an addiction to amphetamines, as shown by actual brain scans. Hopeless romantics like me are both intrigued and saddened to learn that the crazy-in-love phase could be pinpointed in the brain as equaling something as plebeian as snorting a bag of cocaine. Classic psychology explains that the "merging" feeling--the well-sung "losing yourself in another" moment--is something that resembles the feeling infants have of being connected to their mothers, their gaze ("mirroring") being an intrinsic part of the development of the self.

A topic that has not been discussed is the hyper-attunement between couples that leads them to feel almost telepathically connected. When it's one-sided, it's similar to referential thinking, and can seem psychotic ("That song was telling me to call you"). When it's mutual, it creates a bond between two people who believe that there is something truly magical, even fated, about their meeting.

This feeling of being so intensely connected that you know what the other is thinking (or thinking of them at the exact moment they were thinking of you) is what I refer to as "telepathic lust." It primes the couple for the next phase of love when hormones quell and sanity returns. However, the "uncanny" similarities remain as stories that keep the couple attached. This "we were meant to be" feeling can help them get through the arguments about daily life that are inevitable--or, in the case of "love addicts" (who only remain for the initial "high" time), it adds to disillusionment since the significant other is supposed to be able to continue "reading" her or his mind.